Perry Mason, I'm not...

I was talking with a friend the other day, who mentioned the notion of feeling guilty about things. This got me to thinking-namely, that there is an awful lot of guilt in this world, a lot of it the product of religious indoctrination. I mean, the Jewish and Catholic faiths in particular seem to have been built on a bedrock of feeling guilty!

Oddly enough though, I'm not here to discuss how everyone should be absolved of their guilt. Yeah, there's such a thing as overkill in the guilt category, but the truth is, barring some neuroses, if you're feeling guilty, there's usually a pretty damned good chance that you've done something, or not done something that you know you either shouldn't have, or could have done better. That's not to say everyone should walk around feeling awful about the way they picked on little Johnny Dorko in 4th grade, or surrender their life's earnings to a charity as penance, but rather that there seems to be a whole new industry out there that seeks to absolve people of guilt.

"It's not your fault!" "Be empowered"! "You're not responsible for others feelings, they are!". I dunno-if you crap all over someone, I think you're probably a little responsible for them feeling bad. Lord knows, I've been a dickhead more than once in my life, and when I look on it in hindsight, I feel bad about it, and try not to repeat those actions. Its what makes me (hopefully) a better person than I was. And unless you're some kind of infomercial trained psychopath, you probably ought to feel at least a little bad about it too, and try to do better next time. I mean, if your attitude is "fuck'em, its their issue", you're going to leave a wake of unhappy folks behind you, and sooner or later you will be well and roundly hated by those familiar with your remarkable self-centeredness, and complete lack of remorse.

So, what's the bottom line? If you f-up, yes: you should feel bad. And then you should either rectify the situation, or at the very least make note of it, and improve the way you handle it next time. I don't think you need to let the guilt devour you, but I do think you need to feel it bite, just so you remain in touch with what is right and wrong.

Just sayin.